Well with week 35 we have truly hit the hormones stage! Today whilst driving into town, stereo blaring with Chris Brown’s Forever, Little Bean and I bopping along in the car, laughing and being silly, out of nowhere I had tears running down my face!?!? I don’t know why? I wasn’t sad, its not a soppy song – I was feeling really happy, having fun! But yes the tears came and they flowed. All of a sudden I was thinking about how there will only be a few more weeks where it will be just me and Little Bean bopping in the car. Obviously there will be times that we’re on our own but for the most part our time special time together is coming to an end. In a few short weeks we will be joined by our baby boy – and please don’t get me wrong, we want our baby boy more than anything in the world. All of us are excited about it, even Little Bean gets excited whenever she sees a baby at the moment and wants to “cuddle” with them, whether we know the baby or not. Throughout the day she will randomly plant herself on my knee and say “hello bump” and give it a kiss and a cuddle.
I think at the moment I’m starting to think about the unknown. A little over two years ago I was wondering how our lives were going to change once Little Bean came into our lives, I was excited, scared, apprehensive but I couldn’t envisage how her arrival would impact on our lives. That is where I’m at again, I’m so excited to be carrying our boy and with each day that passes I’m that little bit more excited that soon he will be here. Only with each passing day I’m also wondering how our boy’s arrival will affect the relationship that I have with Little Bean. She “gets” me and I “get” her, I think mentally we are very similar people and we have a really good friendship with each other. I think she will revel in being a big sister and with her helpful demeanour I think she will probably drive me potty wanting to help, I can hear her now “my do it” or “help me” – she means I’ll help you but she hasn’t yet grasped you, me and my properly. I don’t want her to feel pushed out by his arrival, at the end of the day one of the reasons we chose to have another baby was so that she had a sibling close in age to grow up with. She loves her big brother Curly like he was the last person on earth but there is a big age gap between them and soon he will not want to play with his little sister, he’ll be out having fun with his mates.
I’m hoping to try to stick to doing things that we generally do during the week like swimming, walks in the park, playing in the garden but now I’ll need to think of the logistics of it a little more carefully. How do you go swimming with a baby and a toddler? OK so we normally go with our friends but she has a toddler too?
We always try to treat the children as equals and share the attention they receive but obviously new babies need lots of attention in the beginning, especially as I am planning to breastfeed again. But what will be, will be I guess!? Am I alone in this? How did you feel when your next baby was due?