Daddy’s Girl

Over the past few months, I have watched Little Bean’s relationship with her Daddy blossom and grow. She has always spread herself pretty evenly between us, but since I am a stay-at-home Mum, we spend lots of quality time together doing many fun things. She’s a funny girl because the person she gravitates towards each day is the person she first sees when she wakes in the morning.

On a typical weekday, she will be a Mummy’s girl, but more often than not, at the weekend, she will wake up to Daddy’s face and be a Daddy’s girl for the rest of the day.

Now, as you’re probably aware, we have been moving house since last Wednesday, and so Daddy has been off work and getting up early to make the most of each day since he has been the first person she has seen each day she hasn’t wanted to know me in the slightest!

Daddy’s Girl 1

I love to see her face light up when Daddy enters the room and scoops her into his arms for a “big Daddy squidge”; it melts my heart. Yesterday morning she woke at 6.30 am! On a Sunday morning!!!! So I plucked her out of her bed and tried to encourage her to cuddle up to me and Daddy in our bed in the hope that she might drift off again – no chance! But what she did will remain etched in my memory forever. She shuffled herself as close to Daddy as she could and laid down next to him with her face on Daddy’s cheek, and she looked so content and happy.

If I could have gotten out of my bed fast enough to get a camera without disturbing her, I would have done so because it would have made a gorgeous picture, but I knew I couldn’t, so I had to settle for a mental picture instead.

Whilst all of this is lovely and heart-warming to a certain extent, I feel bruised and a little “unloved” because my little girl doesn’t want me. In my heart, I know that she loves me and Daddy can never be Mummy, but I do sometimes feel like a poor substitute.

Daddy's girl

Last night, when we got in from a day out, I sat on the sofa and cuddled her; she seemed happy and content. But then Daddy came in and sat down, so both Little Bean and Curly went over and cuddled up with Daddy, leaving me alone like an outcast. I’m guessing it’s just my hormones; they are my babies, and nothing will ever stop me from loving them, but I definitely felt rejected. Maybe when my little boy is here, I’ll have someone on my sofa??
Do you ever feel like this? How do you tell yourself to snap out of it???

7 thoughts on “Daddy’s Girl”

  1. Hello Sabina,
    I took some time here to get to know you a little bit. I know what you mean by this post about daddy’s girl. I have 3 little girls who are all over their daddy the minute he walks through the door till the moment they drop off to sleep. It took me some getting used to especially with the first one but as the girls kept comming and I got busier and busier I sort of became quite glad and smug that my girls cling to their daddy so much. With him around I get to do much more, faster and even get some time for myself. But I do get those pangs of jelousy every now and then especially becasue I can see they have ‘bigger’ more cuddly hugs for him. But some time ago I was saying this at the hairdresser who retorted…. “you should be glad they are happy to be with their father”…. children who are abused by their father shudder the moment he walks through the door. This certainly put my hurt and annoyance into perspective. Hope it does for you too.

    • I do have the days where I’m grateful for the space but I think hormones are playing their part at the moment. Thank you for dropping by, if I can keep my internet working long enough to do more than check my emails I shall drop by and check out your site too!

  2. Ah bless ya! I don’t really have that issue now as Daddy isn’t here! But when B was little I felt like this all the time, but when I spoke about it was made to feel guilty for saying anything as he worked and so she had more of me to start with! But then you have a pic of my ex that will probably fit with that!! Now it’s great because my girls only have me, although a pang of hurt hit today when H was sat at the dinner table at my Mum’s and asked where J and L are, Daddy I can deal with, and L is her sister, but to hear my baby mention that woman’s name! I managed to keep it together to remind myself that i would rather her like Daddy’s girlfriend than hate her and not enjoy the time she spends with them – but I will always be her Mum, and even Daddy’s can’t be what Mummy’s are, no matter the family set up – Little Bean loves you as much as Daddy and I’m betting you start getting more cuddles right about the time Beanie Boy comes along!!!

  3. God bless you! Since Daddy isn’t around anymore, I no longer have that problem. When B was younger, I always felt this way, but my husband made me feel bad whenever I said it because he was always busy working, which meant that I could devote more of myself to her. You have a picture of my ex that could go with that, though! Now that my girls only have me, things are fine. However, I felt a twinge of pain today when H asked me, while we were having dinner at my mother’s house, where J and L were.

  4. It’s lovely now that my children have me all to themselves, but I had a little hurt when H asked where J and L were at my mother’s house today. I can cope with Daddy, and L is her sister, but it hurt to hear my baby utter that woman’s name! Reminding myself that I would rather her like Daddy’s girlfriend than despise her and not enjoy the time she spends with them was something I was able to muster up.

    • It is a difficult one and certainly one I know my husband felt early on when Will was little but as you say, you want to know that your children are happy when they are with them because that means they are being loved and cared for. In time you may be able to be friends with ‘Daddy’s girlfriend’ which is great for the children to see. It took time but it happened for us too x

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