Breastfeeding in Public: Tips for Feeding Your Baby Without the Stress

So, you’ve packed the nappy bag, remembered the wipes, found your keys (eventually) and managed to get out of the house. You’re halfway through your coffee and the latest gossip, when your baby starts grizzling for a feed.

Typical, right?

If you’re new to breastfeeding, feeding your little one in public can feel a bit daunting. You might be worried about people looking, struggling to get your baby latched on, or accidentally flashing half the café in the process.

When you’re already tired and still figuring out breastfeeding, the last thing you need is to feel like you’re putting on a show for everyone around you.

Some mamas will happily whip out a boob wherever they are. Others would rather find a quiet corner and have a little privacy. Either way is right, depending on what suits you and your bub.

In this guide, we’re sharing some genuinely useful breastfeeding-in-public tips to help you feel a little more prepared, a little less awkward and ready to get on with your day, baby in tow.

Why Can Breastfeeding in Public Feel So Awkward?

Breastfeeding is a perfectly normal part of having a baby, so why can it feel like such a big deal when you’re out and about?

Well, you’re learning a new skill, your hormones might be all over the shop, you’re probably running on very little sleep, and suddenly you’re expected to do something quite personal in front of a bunch of strangers. No pressure.

You’re still figuring out the whole breastfeeding thing

In those early weeks, getting your baby into a comfortable position can feel like you’re attempting a yoga pose for the first time. It looks easy enough, but there are arms, bras, nips and lips all trying for a celestial alignment.

Doing all that at home is one thing. Doing it in a busy café while someone at the next table is eating a toastie is a little different.

Give yourself a break. You and your baby are both learning.

You’re worried about people staring

Even if nobody is actually looking, it can sometimes feel like everyone is.

You might be wondering whether your top is covering enough, whether someone will make a comment or whether you’ll be the centre of attention.

Most people are far too busy worrying about their own lives to give you much thought. And if someone does happen to notice, well, babies need feeding. It’s not exactly breaking news.

Your baby has other ideas

You might have carefully planned your outing around your baby’s usual feeding times, only for them to decide they need a feed ten minutes after you’ve left the house.

Or they might latch on beautifully at home but become distracted by every person, dog and passing shopping trolleys.

Welcome to breastfeeding. There isn’t always a plan!

Practical Tips for Breastfeeding in Public

1. Start somewhere that doesn’t make you nervous

If the thought of breastfeeding in the middle of a packed shopping centre makes you want to stay home forever, don’t start there.

Try somewhere that feels a bit more relaxed.

• A friend’s place.
• A quiet café.
• Your local park.
• A shopping centre during a quieter time.
• Somewhere you’re already familiar with.

You don’t need to go from feeding on the lounge at home to feeding in the middle of a food court in one giant leap.

Take it at your own pace. The more you do it, the more you’ll work out what makes you and your baby comfortable. We’ve all had those moments where nothing quite goes to plan, so take it at your own pace.

2. Wear something that makes life easier

This might sound obvious, but what you’re wearing can make a massive difference when you’re trying to feed a baby.

Choose a nursing bra you’ve already had a practice run with at home. Whether it’s a traditional drop-down cup you can wrangle one-handed, or another method such as pull aside, or a zip that gives you easy access, you’ll want to know how it works before you’re out with a hungry baby.

The best nursing bras have built-in supports after the cup has been ‘dropped down’ such as folded-edge side sling, support sling or A-frame sling. These help keep your breast supported and facing forward while feeding, making it easier to get everything lined up.

Want a little more coverage? An A-frame sling is a great option because it supports the breast while also acting as a modesty panel when you remove the cup while feeding out and about.

You don’t need to buy an entirely new wardrobe of nursing clothes, either. Sometimes a stretchy singlet under a loose T-shirt does the job perfectly.

A few outer layer options worth trying:

• Button-up shirts that are easy to open.
• Loose T-shirts you can lift from the bottom.
• Nursing tops; these usually have discreet openings.
• Stretchy singlets that allow easy access.
• Clothes that don’t need a Casanova to get out of the way.

If the nursing bra and a shirt over the top is still too fiddly, you could simplify and just wear a nursing tank, that has the best of both worlds with a nursing bra with folded edge sling built into an outerwear seamless tank.

Have a little practice at home before heading out. Try getting your baby into position while wearing the outfit you’ve chosen.

Because the last thing you want is to be standing in a café trying to work out how to get your top over your head while your hungry baby is letting the whole place know about it.

If you prefer to use a nursing cover, that’s fine too. If you don’t, that’s equally fine. Whatever works for you.

3. Find a decent spot to sit

A comfortable chair and a bit of breathing room can make feeding your baby a whole lot easier.

When you’re out and about, keep an eye out for somewhere that gives you enough space to get settled with a few options for direction.

You might prefer:

• A comfy corner in a café.
• A bench in the park.
• A quiet spot in a shopping centre.
• A chair with decent back support.
• A parents’ room if you fancy a bit of peace and quiet.

Parents’ rooms can be handy, but they’re not compulsory. You don’t have to disappear into a room just because you’re breastfeeding.

If you’d rather stay at your table with your coffee, go for it.

The main thing is that you’re comfortable and your baby can feed safely.

4. Don’t wait until your baby is absolutely starving

We’ve all been there. You think, “I’ll just finish this one thing,” and suddenly your baby is screaming as if you’ve personally offended them.

If you can, try feeding when you notice those early hunger cues rather than waiting until your little one is making a scene.

You might notice your baby:

• Turning their head towards your breast.
• Sucking on their hands.
• Opening and closing their mouths.
• Becoming restless.
• Making those little “I’m ready for milk/grunty” noises.

Of course, babies don’t always give you plenty of warning. Sometimes they go from perfectly content to desperately hungry in about 10 seconds.

Don’t beat yourself up if that happens. Just find somewhere comfortable and get on with the feed.

5. Pack the things that make your life easier

You don’t need to lug an entire nursery around with you, but a few little extras can save you a fair bit of hassle.

A few things worth adding to the nappy bag:

• A water bottle: Because making milk is easier if you’re hydrated.
• Breast pads: Handy if you leak.
• A muslin cloth: For dribbles, spills, shade and covering a wonder of things.
• A spare top: Because babies are unpredictable little creatures.
• A snack: For when you’ve finally got a chance to eat.
• A nursing cover: If you like using one.
• Nipple cream: If it’s part of your usual routine.

Don’t feel like you need to tick every box. Pack what you think you might use. Better to have and not need than need and not have. Don’t stress if you forget something? You’ll survive, and remember to bring it on your next venture. There are very few parenting situations that can’t be sorted out with a little improvisation.

6. Bring a friend, if it makes you feel better

If you’re feeling a bit nervous, take someone with you.

Your partner, your mum, your best mate or another mum who’s been through it all before can make things feel much less daunting.

They can grab you a coffee, help you find somewhere to sit or simply keep you company while you get your baby settled.

Sometimes, just having someone there who says, “You’re doing great.” is all the encouragement you need.

After a few times, you might find you don’t need the backup anymore.

7. Don’t feel like you have to cover up

This one is entirely personal.

Some mums love a nursing cover. Others find their baby kicks it off, gets hot and tangled underneath it, or spends the entire feed hiding underneath it too.

There is no right or wrong way to do it.

If a cover makes you feel more comfortable, brilliant. If you’d rather use your clothing for a bit of privacy, that’s fine too. If you’re happy to feed without covering up, that’s absolutely ok as well.

You’re feeding your baby. You’re not responsible for making every stranger in the room feel comfortable with something that’s perfectly normal.

8. Give yourself a bit of extra time

Trying to squeeze a feed into a ten-minute gap between appointments could be a recipe for unnecessary stress.

If you can, allow a little extra time when you’re heading out with your baby.

You might need to:

• Find somewhere to sit.
• Settle your baby.
• Get stuck in a queue or traffic.
• Have a couple of tries at getting the latch right.
• Stop for a burp.
• Deal with a nappy that suddenly needs changing.
• Wait for your baby to wake up.
• The list goes on….

Give yourself permission to slow down. The shopping can wait another ten minutes.

What If Someone Makes a Comment?

Hopefully, you’ll never have to deal with this, unless it’s a positive one. Most people will carry on with their day and barely notice you’re feeding your baby.

But if someone does make a comment, it can really knock your confidence, especially when you’re already feeling a bit exposed. Your baby will pick up on your mood too, so it’s best to be prepared.

Know your rights.

Breastfeeding in public is protected under the Equality Act 2010, which makes it unlawful for anyone to ask you to stop, cover up, or leave a public place because you’re breastfeeding. You have the right to breastfeed wherever you and your baby need to.

You don’t have to leave a café, hide away in a toilet or stop feeding simply because somebody else feels uncomfortable.

No one can tell you to cover up, leave or discriminate against you when breastfeeding or expressing/pumping in place like:

–       cafés, restaurants and shops

–       public transport

–       workplaces

–       education settings

What can you say if someone gets cheeky?

There’s quite a list of comebacks and memes, compiled from other mums all over the world that have been in similar situations. It all depends on how you want to handle it. A few suggestions:

If you want to keep things polite:

“Just feeding my baby”

If someone is being a bit rude:

“I’m not breaking the law.”

At the end of the day, you can simply ignore them and carry on with your feed. You don’t owe anyone a reply, a detailed explanation or an apology.

If someone is aggressive or makes you feel unsafe, remove yourself from the situation and get help if you need it. Your safety comes first.

Real Talk: It Does Get Easier

The first time you breastfeed in public, you might feel like you’ve got a neon sign above your head saying, “LOOK AT ME AND MY BOOBS!”

Chances are that nobody is paying nearly as much attention as you think they are. The ones who are, have no doubt travelled your road before and are super proud of you, silently cheering you on. “Go mama!”

The next time, you might feel a little more comfortable. Then, before you know it, you’ll be sitting in the corner of your favourite café, feeding your baby while scrolling through your phone and wondering what all the fuss was about.

That’s not to say every feed will be a breeze.

Some days, your baby will refuse to latch. Other days, they’ll be too busy watching what’s going on around them. And occasionally, you’ll end up with a milk map on your top and no idea how it got there.

That’s motherhood for you.

The important thing is that confidence comes from doing it, not from waiting until you magically feel ready.

You don’t need to become the most outgoing person in the room. You just need to find a way of feeding your baby that feels right for you.

And if that means starting with a quiet corner before working your way up to a busy café, so be it.

One feed at a time.

The Bottom Line

Breastfeeding in public can feel a bit awkward at first. You’re learning, your baby’s learning, and you’re both trying to work out how to make it all happen outside the comfort of home.

But with a bit of practice, the right clothes, a comfortable spot and a little patience, it can become just another part of your day.

You don’t have to cover up. You don’t have to hide. And you don’t have to feel confident from the very beginning.

Feed your baby where you’re comfortable, take things at your own pace and don’t worry too much about what anyone else thinks.

Because at the end of the day, you’ve got a hungry baby to feed, a coffee that’s probably gone cold and approximately 27 other things to worry about.

You’ve got this, Mama.