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In an effort to help with the “clearing out” ready for moving house, I have been trawling my way through the Sky+ Planner (well its kind of clearing out rubbish!). We have decided that as we are moving house twice in the next 6 months rather than pay for two installation fees we are just going to disconnect Sky and move to Freeview+ instead (AND obviously saving ourselves a stack of money each month on subscription fees!). But as usual I digress, this afternoon whilst Little Bean is napping I have watched “My Breasts Could Kill Me” which followed reporter Dawn Porter who was finding out more about Breast Cancer and the people who take the huge decision to have double mastectomies to reduce their risk of getting Breast Cancer in the first place. This is a subject close to my heart as there have been many people in my life who have been touched by Breast Cancer, more recently my sister-in-law at the age of 29!!!! I’m very pleased to say that she is now post-cancer and getting on with her life but it is something which always sits in the back of your mind.

Since becoming a Mummy myself I have become much more aware about just how precious life really is and although I obviously wasn’t in a rush to die before I had Little Bean, I think I am now more afraid of it because I don’t want to leave my beautiful daughter and of course my very important family and friends. One of the poignant things on my Breasts Could Kill Me which stood out for me though was that Dawn had sadly lost her own Mum to breast cancer when she was just 7 years old. She spoke to a Mother who had been diagnosed with terminal breast cancer who was petrified of leaving behind her children and had started a Memory Box and Book in which she kept photographs, newspaper clippings, locks of hair, pieces of jewellery – basically anything that held a strong memory for her of time with her children so that when she is gone they will have something to look back through to make them feel closer to her. Dawn Porter said that unfortunately she didn’t have anything like this when her Mum died, she had a clear memory of her Mum picking her up from school but other than that she just had to go around the house collecting things herself. The good thing about the Memory Box/Book is that your child will see things from your point of view, not theirs. A walk in the park might just be “a walk in the park” to your child, but the flower that they picked (and you pressed) will make that a more special trip to you. Something that they say will probably be forgotten by them when they are older but not for us parents!! At the moment I giggle inside when Little Bean picks up one of Curlys’ toy robots because not matter how many times I say to her “RO-BOT”, she still calls it “Robert”. Just a silly little thing to most people but to me Robots will never be the same again!

This is MY reminder to myself, I AM going to start my memories box and book, they aren’t going to stay locked in my mind because when I’m gone, so are they . . . .

What would you put in your memory box/book? How do you want your time with your children to be remembered? Comments on a postcard (well just in the comments section really) please!

Photo credits: http://www.floridastateparks.org/cayocosta/PhotoGallery.cfm and http://www.trendyshoppes.com/too-sweet/amy-butler-design-baby-memory-book.html

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  1. supersinglemum
    April 20, 2010 / 3:21 pm

    Hmmm, I actually see my blog as a bit of a “memory book” but as it is “virtual” I am almost tempted to print it off!!!
    I kept diary’s as a teenager and although they make me cringe like mad, I will keep them forever, not just for when I am gone, but when my girls reach the age of 15-17 when I wrote them, they can read and know that I was young once and I talk from experience!
    I made a memory book and box for B when she was born but no longer have it, just another thing that I have no idea where it ended up when me and Daddy split up. I always say I am going to do this kind of thing but I never get round to it!

    • mummymatters
      April 20, 2010 / 8:56 pm

      Yeah I see what you mean as I see my blog as that too but then there are a lot of things that I don’t put on here that mean a lot to me too.

      I have a “to do” list as long as my arm – perhaps I should add it to my 101 things to do in 1001 days and finally publish it to motivate me!?!?

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