A Mother’s Pride
Last week whilst getting ready for moving house, I arranged for Little Bean to spend the afternoon with one of her Godmothers so that I could get on with packing. Nothing strange in that you might think, but actually she has never spent time on her own with her Godmother before. Only ever when I have been around. Whenever Little Bean is going to be doing something without me around I always tell her about it a couple of times before the event.
So last Thursday morning when she woke up in the morning we had our usual conversation over breakfast. “What are we going to do today?” to which she came back with her usual response “play”. I said that yes we could do playing in the morning but that after her nap she would be going to spend the afternoon with J and E (J’s Daughter). Again, I got the usual response when I tell her what we are doing “okay” in a sing-song kind of voice.
Again when she went to bed for her nap I told her that she would be going to J’s for the afternoon and that Mummy would collect her later, “okay” was her response.
So after her nap she woke up calling her Godmother’s name. I went to get her from her bedroom and she told me “shoes, coat, bag” – she likes to be organised. Whenever we are leaving the house, she will go through the same checklist of things we need in order to leave.
Off we went in our car and pulled up at J’s house. I got her out of the car and headed for the front door where J was stood waiting. Little Bean greeted her with a hug and then walked past J into the house before turning to me and declaring “bye bye” with a wave. My cue to go then!! She rarely spends time with people other than myself. She spends one afternoon per week with her Nanny L and 2-4 hours at nursery. She has spent the odd couple of hours at my friend Cafebebe’s house but that’s it. I am so full of pride at how well she will stay somewhere without me. She doesn’t bat an eyelid, just waves goodbye and gives me a kiss. Initially I felt quite put out that she seemed so happy to say goodbye to me, but I’ve now come around to the fact that I have obviously managed to fill her with enough confidence in herself that she will be ok and confidence in me that I will return to pick her up. I look to other mothers who drop their kids off at nursery to have them pealed away from them and think how lucky I am.
When I collect her, its the best feeling in the world as she literally drops whatever she is doing, whatever she has in the hands and runs to me with open arms and a big kiss. That’s when I know that I’ve done the right thing in leaving her because she has had time to herself, time away from me and she is happy with that. But even more so, she is overjoyed at my return and once again I am full of pride!
May 11 at 8:27 pm
Hahaha, you wait, B was like this and it was great! I’ve been back to work 6 weeks now and H still cries when I drop her off – it is however easier as I know once I am gone she is fine, but to hear a happy “Bye Mummy” would be nice lol!!!
May 13 at 7:56 pm
She will get there, she probably just doesn’t understand what’s going on as you’ve spent so much time together. Don’t forget she’s just had J&J disappear too. You never know how their young minds work.
May 11 at 9:28 pm
Ah how lovely, Baba is pretty good with being left. He usually just laughs when I leave which is worrying! But is so excited when I come back which is lovely. It does make you feel like you have done something right doesn’t it? xx
May 13 at 8:00 pm
Ahh bless him – not sure about the whole laughing thing though? It certainly doesmake me feel like I’ve done the right thing with her. She has never spent more than 2 hrs at nursery but I’ve been doing it once a week since she was 6 months old and I really think its been good for her.
May 12 at 10:29 am
Awwww! I wish J would be like that. He still now clings to me, no matter who it is, well with the exception of Grandma or his Uncle. He’s fine the moment I leave but until then someone has to drag him off me!
She sounds a wonderfully organised and confident little girl! You should be very proud!
May 13 at 8:06 pm
I really do feel for you and other parents whose children get upset when they leave them. She has only done it to me 2 or 3 times and I felt awful walking away listening to her screaming for me.
And thank you, I am very very proud of her, she is totally organised just like me and she is very confident – almost fearless which scares me but I just need to direct it as best I can!