How do we do it?

I have a fear that our 2yo daughter, Little Bean, is a monster of our own making!  Well not really a monster (though she can be sometimes) but what I’m actually talking about is her nightly bottle routine.

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To give you a bit of background, Little Bean was breastfed until 5 months, apart from the dream feed of the evening at 10.30pm when Daddy would give her a bottle of expressed breast milk.  She didn’t wean well as she just didn’t seem interested in “proper” food and is only just getting to grips with big girl food now.  Even that is a very limited diet!

My problem is that she is STILL having a 6oz bottle of growing up formula at bedtime (7ish) and then a bottle of goodnight formula at 10.30pm.  This means that she isn’t always in the mood for breakfast in the morning and so the day begins!  She has a 3oz bottle of cows milk at 10am for her morning nap, lunch around 12.30pm and generally a pretty good tea at 6pm.  With baby boy due in 6 weeks, we’re really keen to knock this dream feed on the head as we will have our hands full sorting him out.  And of course, we are both aware that her current dream feed is probably one of the reasons that she is still not eating well in the daytime.

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So my question to you is, how do we stop the dream feed?  Do we just go cold turkey and hope for the best??  We have tried this a couple of times but when we aren’t in her bedroom by 11pm she wakes up shouting for milk and screams blue murder until the milk is presented to her?

I fear that we have got her into such a good routine that we are now struggling to break it but we know that it is something which needs doing.

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Also, I fear that she is behind with her “cup” habits.  She will happily drink juice from a spouted cup but will still only take milk from a bottle.  I’ve tried on a number of occasions to get her to drink her juice from an open cup, which she finds amusing for the first couple of times but then we slide back into old habits and out comes the sippy cup again.

And then there’s the dummy!  From the age of 12 months I stopped her having a dummy in the daytime other than for naps and car journeys (I needed the peace and quiet!) but I’m wondering if I should now be trying to stop her from having that altogether or am I trying to tackle too many things at once? 

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Please leave me your comments, as I say our baby boy is due in 6 weeks and so I would ideally like to get Little Bean in a new-ish routine before he arrives.  Oh and did I forget to mention, we are moving house in the next 2-3 weeks too!! Whoever said life was dull?

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11 Comments

  1. Emma
    August 10, 2010 / 11:19 am

    Hi, I’m going through the same problem with my DD right now, with the dummy anyway, she has a fit if I take it off her, and I’ve also noticed her teeth are started to get goofy! So, it will soon be time to give them up altogether (got help us)!

    As for the milk situation, I don’t know what to suggest with regards the late milk feed, other than stop altogether until she gets used to only having milk at 7.30pm before bed, they soon get used to a new routine.

    S is still using her baby milk bottle, she also refuses to drink milk in a juice cup, but I’m hoping this will change before her 3rd birthday!!

    Good luck..

    x

    • mummymatters
      August 10, 2010 / 11:58 am

      Yeah I’m worried about LB’s teeth going goofy so I’m really keen to knock it all on the head. Other’s have suggested the dummy fairy paying a visit but I’m not sure she’d understand? Maybe I’m underestimating her!!

      I’m pleased to hear she’s not the only one of her age who is still on bottle, dummy etc – I thought she was really behind and it was because I was being rubbish at getting her off them!!

      Thanks xx

  2. RebaMc
    August 10, 2010 / 11:24 am

    How about gradually reducing the amount in the night feed until she doesn’t want/need it anymore? I’ve not had to do this, but just a thought 🙂

    Good luck
    x

    • mummymatters
      August 10, 2010 / 11:52 am

      That’s pretty much what I suggested to Hubby, although I think I was suggesting reducing the amount of scoops of milk until it was basically water so she didn’t think it was worth waking for. Hubby looked at me like I’d lost my mind though! I think its got to be worth a try!!

      Thank you!! x

  3. mumtoc
    August 10, 2010 / 12:54 pm

    When I took C of his bed time formula milk (just before his bedtime around 7.30pm), I switched it from formula to cows milk. I think the idea of reducing LB’s formula milk an ounce at a time might work.

    With regard to the dummy, C still has his during his afternoon nap and at night time. When I took him for the 2 year check the HV said that there was no need to take it off him at the moment. I think its more of a concern if they have them all day, and all night. I’ve just started potty training C this week so after that’s over, I’ll tackle removing his dummy for his afternoon nap. Maybe in another few months, around Christmas, I’ll tackle taking it off him at night too.

    If I were you, I’d try reducing the forumla milk first, because this is going to be the thing that inteferes with your routine with your new baby boy. If you leave her with the dummy for another few months, it won’t be inteferring with anything. It may even spur her on to not having a dummy by the time she gets used to her new little brother, and she may identify that she doesn’t need it now she’s not a baby herself any more!!

    • mummymatters
      August 11, 2010 / 9:46 am

      Hope the potty training goes well, I’m not even thinking about that yet until I can get a decent routine in place when baby is here. I think I will also leave the dummy for a little while longer and just tackle the milk to start with, hopefully that will have the knock on effect of making her more hungry in the daytime.

      Thanks for your help xxx

  4. kim
    August 11, 2010 / 8:14 am

    Hi Sabina

    Hope you and the family are all ok.

    Being the nasty parent i am lol I tackled things head on when Jack & Jo were little after being a really nice parent to Dee and her getting to 4 1/2 years old and still wanting a dummy – night drink – sleeping in my bed etc I decided it would be better to be cruel to be kind, not sure if that was more for me or them though.

    I reduced the formula to the amount of water and after 4 – 5 days it was just water and they both gave up waking and when I decided to take their dummy off them Jack gave his to some baby cows and Jo gave hers to a baby who needed it cos they were crying (all planned of course) 2 – 3 nights crying for it they never bothered again. I must add I did these at different times a few weeks apart & they both chose a new teddy to take to bed instead, and I may add still have them lol.

    I believe these things are habit rather than need and the first couple of nights may be horrendous, CRYING, TANTRUMS but it will be fine – make sure you plan it for when you have support with you – have faith you are a fab Mum and YOU CAN DO IT xxxxxxxx
    Gonna hypnotise you now. SAY AFTER ME I believe I believe I do belive lol

    • mummymatters
      August 11, 2010 / 9:44 am

      Ah thank you Kim, I do miss you!!! I think you have hit the nail on the head, I know that she has these things more out of habit than necessity. We just keep making up excuses as to “why we shouldn’t do it yet” – moving house, new baby, a bit of a cold etc etc but we know that we really need to do it, as much for ourselves as for her.

      Thank you xxx

  5. Hayley
    August 12, 2010 / 7:57 pm

    Water. I would say thats the best solution. J had milk till, god knows when, I cant even remember, eventually onto cows milk and that in itself has only been ditched at nighttime in the past 2 months and hes 3! He does however still have water from a tommee tippee toddler sports bottle which doesnt leak and has a sports cap, its ideal. He still has his dummy at night, something he will be giving up soon but the whole time he is still learning to sleep which unforuntaely is ongoing!

    Just remember though hun we can all give you advice and suggestions but your the one thats gotta do it so do what works for YOU! xxxx

    • mummymatters
      August 12, 2010 / 8:03 pm

      Thanks Hayley, that’s a great comment! We’ve decided that as I’m such a great shopper and had stock piled the formula milk – we’re going to use up the last two boxes that we have and then change the “good night” milk to cow’s milk and gradually decrease that one. Then see how things go from there! xx

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